Recently in our lives, we have gone from having the special love of one beautiful granddaughter, who is 3 1/2 years old, to newborn granddaughters. Now having three granddaughters, I have been reflecting on how that actually feels........and to keep my writing skills moving along, I have kept a journal for feelings of things happening in the our lives with Bailey Grace, granddaughter number 1, so I am continuing this same pattern for Emma James and Hazel Elizabeth. They are all so very special and maybe one day when they are older, the journal written by me, their 'Lola,' will mean something important to them. It will at least let them know what I was thinking at the time, with no holds barred and how much they were loved.
Thinking on the characteristics of what so many grandparents may feel, I would like to share some of my feelings. It is sheer pleasure together for my husband and I to be around our grandchildren. After the visits we think, who else can make us do such foolish things and we love it. It is a moment that I am given permission to be the "Crazy Lady and my husband can be the "Magic Man!" You live in the moment, as the children do. It is all about the here and now. Joy is simple. It is discovering the joy of life through their eyes.
As a grandparent you get to be a role model in a different way from the parents. It is an opportunity shared only with grandparents. Children think of grandparents totally different than their parents. I know what is important and can let go easier than I could as a parent - things that don't matter down the road are pushed aside - what matters most is if each grandchild is happy, healthy and is becoming productive in their own way. Helping them to let their own creativity out. It is much easier to do this as a grandparent than as a parent.
The freedom of no longer being "in charge" actually frees me of making the mundane day to day decisions and being there more for the fun, fun, fun. No, don't get me wrong, if my opinion is asked about something, then I will certainly do my best to give up to date information that my children may choose to use or may choose to go with something else, which is totally their prerogative. This is the part that many grandparents miss. I encourage you to allow yourself to no longer be the one in charge. Let your children make those decisions and only if you are asked do you need to become involved.
You are able to come and go and make everyone happy. You have your own limitations to watch for. Keep your eyes open and always ready to learn from your grandchildren. They know so much more than we give them credit for. Listen, watch and learn. Most of all - LOVE!
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