WHAT I KNOW NOW FOR SURE!

 WHAT I KNOW NOW FOR SURE!

The other day while flipping through a magazine, I noticed people sharing what they know for sure. There is actually a book with this title by Oprah. Just about little life lessons that we as humans need to pay attention to as we experience them. Then I saw this article about living through the global pandemic and what have I learned, along with others about what I now know for sure. Being in a lock down, not seeing friends and family in person tends to put a whole new spin on our world.

For example, I know that I deserve unconditional love from myself. It is a form of self-care. I learned that if I don't take care of myself then I can't help others.

We all need to learn to live with a little more grace and empathy. No one knows what others have been going through, just as they don't know about your circumstances. 

We as human beings are more resilient than we give ourselves credit for. If I truly look deep inside of my soul, I know that I can problem solve most of my own issues. With that in mind, I then can and should reach out to others who may be experiencing the same things. We are adaptable if we allow ourselves to learn from our circumstances. This in turn helps us to move forward. It has taught me that I know better who I am and what I want in my life. There is a Maya Angelou quote that I am reminded of:

"When you learn, teach. When you get, give."

Love is the only way through this crisis that we are all experiencing. Sometimes this means that solitude for a moment each day helps me to understand that I must let go of what I expect and just embrace what is there. What is there? There are friends, family, books, flowers, sunrises, sunsets, my furbabies, laughter, cooking together, candles, wine, Netflix, deliveries, walks, and how grateful I am to have the love of my life and best friend in the world with me. We support each other. 

All of these plus a kajillion more fill up what we all hopefully have learned by going through COVID. 

One of the biggest thing is that I will never take traveling to other places for granted. And although we now can travel somewhat, it just is not quite the same as it once was.

Quite frankly, there really is not a place at this time that I would feel comfortable going to visit. I have learned that nothing is permanent. Just as that is a little unsettling, it also is reassuring that everything comes and goes and it can be exciting to embrace the new. I know that I will be okay, just in a new way in my own time. 

It is very important to me to have family and friends that take me at face value. I know that I am so grateful to have everyone in my life. Taking the time to journal through the ups and downs of this pandemic most definitely helps guide me. Find those new lessons to learn and new skills to try out. One thing for sure is that my excuses for not exercising have absolutely nothing to do with my busy schedule. Nada!

I will end this blog with a simple gratitude. 

My gratitude is that I see people viewing themselves and others with more patience and empathy. There is something to be said for acknowledging what we have gone through and wondering how we will eventually come out of it together.

WORK - LIFE BALANCE OR LIFE - WORK BALANCE?

 WORK - LIFE BALANCE?

OR

LIFE - WORK BALANCE?

There is an issue in calling it the work - life balance instead of the life - work balance. Work loads should not be taking over anyone's life. Our work does not define us. Let me rephrase that...we define who we are. If we only see ourselves as our job title then we have no balance in our life. There are books, workshops and podcasts to help guide you through it all. Perhaps if a person was so buried in the work side of his/her life, then it might be a good idea to invest in one of these methods to gain your life back again. 

Really I believe that there is a much easier way to take charge. 

• Organize Your Schedule - it may mean to actually write down not only the important meetings that you must attend for work but include the time to run errands, school meetings or activities with your child, sleep, time for the gym or a hair appointment...all of these things are important and in your life. It is not just all about work, even if your boss wants you to believe so. There is a time and place for everyone. Scheduling breaks and time for yourself will actually help in getting more things accomplished at work. Why? Because you are a happier person, a more well-rounded individual and fun to be around. 
• It is important to delegate responsibility. You are not Wonder Woman or Superman. It is important to know your limits. Give yourself permission to say no at times. Or at least a compromise. 
• There has to be a "ME" time. It is called self-care and if you go too long ignoring your needs then you are going to feel as if you are doing a balancing act of spinning all of the plates in your life and they are spinning out of control.
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It is important to detach yourself from your thoughts and become aware of the world around you. Sometimes all it takes is just a few minutes to close your eyes, breathe in and out and make note of how you are feeling and what can you do about getting back in control. Be aware of how you feel and be mindful. Taking a short walk and sensing what you are seeing, hearing, or smelling will sometimes do the trick.

• If you have a significant other or a group of friends then make a date night to meet for dinner. And I might add to put the phone away. 99% of things that come in on your phone can wait. It is much more important to engage with the people around you. 

The most important guidelines to get started with making an efficient and fun life - work balance is to prioritize what is important in your life, walk away from your desk for lunch (making it a special time for yourself or share with a co-worker as long as there is no work talk), and most of all use all of your all of your allocated vacation days. Even if you are taking a day off to go to the zoo or park with a very important person (family or friend or it could be a moment for yourself?)

Not overscheduling yourself is important. No one person can do it all. If you find yourself not moving forward the way you would like to in balancing your life, believe it or not there are Life Coaches that you can talk to in order to move you along. They will believe in you, help you to remove your roadblocks that you set up in your mind, give you clarity, competence and confidence. 

 “Balance is not something you find, it’s something you create.” 

The Differences That Millennials Have

 THE DIFFERENCES THAT MILLENNIALS HAVE

First of all let's be clear of exactly who I am talking about when I say 'millennials.' Specifically, the research calls anyone born in 1981 -1996 a millennial. As we all know, depending on the individual, it can easily move down a few years to the Generation X group which takes into account some born in the late 70's. Rarely, does it move up the Generation Z age group where the oldest age is 22. The experience is not usually in the Z equation.

 Having children in the millennial group as well as working with them side by side in the work force, I have noticed some interesting habits. Trust me, I am sure that they could write a blog on the interesting habits of the Baby Boomers just as well. All I can say is just bring it on. We all have our quirks. No one is shaming or blaming. It is just the way we are. Some of the characteristics I have even picked up on and I am not in the millennial group.

Let's start with clothing and the way we dress. These are basically all no-no's for millennials:

Hawaiian type shirts (so Jimmy Buffet)

Does not matter if it is tucked in or not? (What is with the fanny pack?)

Now I am on to explaining what is not cool to most millennials. Crocs (regardless of gender), New Balance sneakers, shoes with velcro (unless you are too young to tie your shoes or too old to bend down and reach them).

Below you will find looks that just don't make the grade for most millennials which would be the tourist look, the high waisted jeans/pants, and jorts. If you are going to wear jeans then wear jeans. Back in my day of the dirt ages, we actually tore our jeans to make shorts out of them. (Let the truth about me known)! And fabrics are now no iron, so irons and ironing boards are so outdated.

This age group tends to be real "foodies." They truly enjoy new and unusual foods and experiencing new cultures.

Buffets are simply not a good thing for anyone. Especially now with the pandemic still going on. Restaurants are opening up some, however, I know that I must agree with the fact that it is not safe. Really, it never was before the pandemic. I have seen children (and once an adult) reach in with their hands to get something. The other item in the picture is a seasoning, and I am using the term lightly, Mrs. Dash. If you notice they come in a few different flavors. If you are going to take the time to make a delicious meal then go for the real thing. 

Next is one of my all time pet peeves. Be in line at the grocery store and the person in front of you pulls out a check book. Even I do not do that. However, yes, I do still receive paper snail mail bills and do write checks and use the Post Office. More and more I am heading in the other direction. It is just an efficient way to be sure you are paying your bills on time. The mail service, with the pandemic, has been rather shaky. I missed a few bills here and there. Luckily, once I realized it and called the company, I was not charged a late fee. Apparently, they are well aware of this problem. 

Sort of in this same category e-mails vs. text messaging. E-mails are meant for work. And we all know how many of those we usually get. So sending a text message is so much easier. Unless you are retired and this is the only e mails that you receive? 

While we are on the subject of the mail, is there anyone else who receives piles and piles of junk mail catalogs? Don't get me wrong. Some are very reputable companies. Honestly, there have been days that I receive 4 -6 catalogs. Truly, if I want something I can look it up on line. In fact, I walk from the mailbox through the garage and dump all of the catalogs in the trash bin. Never look at them. This is so not environmentally correct. Our county does not pick up recycle. That fact amazes me because when I lived in other places more than 25 years ago, we had recycle containers to put out with the trash. What is wrong with this picture? We all should have recycle bins and service.

There are so many more traits that I could list and I will try to not list too many more. The minimalist approach can not be overlooked. This is how they decorate. There is no need for knick knacks, words of art on the walls, carpeted bathrooms and of all things a fuzzy toilet seat, potpourri, real china and files for papers. 

 

Last, I would like to mention the fact the news stations on our televisions have not kept up. Or maybe they are serving the baby boomers and those older by having 24 hour news stations. Really? On my IPhone I can get instant news at any time that I wish. Is there really a need for this much news. Frankly, it can be depressing and there is only so much I can personally take. Get the facts, resource it and move on. I am not a millennial but this is my motto.

PLAY IT FORWARD

PLAY IT FORWARD

Right now on July 24, 2021, there are so many people who seem not concerned about the COVID 19 variant. The uptick in cases, hospitalizations and deaths does not seem to bother them. I am not here to judge. I am here to write my blog on what we are choosing to do.

 We have been vaccinated. I can't understand those who made the decision not to. Science does say that even those who think or tested that they had it need to get vaccinated. Everyone has a choice. Now, it seems with this new variant growing it is attacking those who have not been vaccinated in a very bad way. Those who have been vaccinated are getting it from those who chose not to. The only good news is that if you are vaccinated you usually have a very mild case of symptoms unless you have deep autoimmune issues.

All of that aside, to stay safe and sane, there is a little chart that I make up to help me look ahead when this is not an issue. I call it 'Play It Forward.' It has all of the things that I want to do with my husband once more people finally go for their vaccination so that this virus can slow down and make it safe again.

I so want to go to a live concert. Several are coming up in our area and from what I see, there are mobs of people going, whether they are inside or outside. There is no social distancing and no (or very few) masks being worn. It is sort of like the song you throw your hands up in the air and act like you just don't care. I can't do that. So meanwhile, I will wait until it is much safer to go and see some concerts that I really want to see. Such as:

Brad Paisley

Jackson Browne

James Taylor

Another interest of mine is to actually go inside a movie theater or a venue to see a play. With no social distancing, I make my choice to stay away. 

I really do not want someone climbing over me to get to their seat, much less sitting shoulder to shoulder with someone I do not know, whether they have been vaccinated and are wearing a mask.

Ahhhh, to travel again. To places we have been before and to new places. We have precious family in New Orleans but now is not the time to go there. I respect their choices and they respect ours. I can't imagine getting on a plane or taking a cruise at this time. Some of the 'hot spots' for Covid right now is Florida, Alabama, Mississippi, Arkansas, Missouri and Tennessee. Yet friends are taking their families down to the beach. They may get it? They may not get it? It seems like a game of Russian roulette to me. We all make our choices.

Even more so than this kind of holiday, I am missing going inside of restaurants to have a date night with my one and only. We both do get out together and with friends to eat outside under a covered patio with fans going full speed ahead in the heat of the summer. Plus, just like us, our friends are vaccinated. This is their choice also. There actually are some places that are asking customers to show their vaccination cards before being admitted in to eat or drink. It may actually come down to that.

Most of all, I miss having our whole extended family in one house (usually ours) for a family celebration. Whether it be birthdays, Thanksgiving or Christmas. I can hang on to that hope that maybe it will be this year? 

Planning it in my head and being grateful for what we can do, accepting what we can't, helps me play it forward.

If we all pay it forward and care for one another, we can all happily play it forward and get on with our lives in a healthy way. Just as we were getting used to some kind of normalcy in not having to wear our masks so often, for now, stores and soon other places will be going back to a wear masks and social distancing. Wouldn't it be nice if we had the times back where we all could feel safe and not have friends who have been vaccinated come down with the variant due to those who decided not to be vaccinated (or possibly even ourselves?)